When the judge is your neighbor

Remember when you were a kid and nothing mattered. You could run around, have fun and be you. Now here we as adults and everything we do is judged by the person sitting next to you. Or maybe it's the person who sits in an office. 

Judged by our clothes, hair, personality, house, car and job. To be honest, All I want to do is raise my middle finger and smile. I am so sick of worrying what people think about me. Away from work, I'm awesome... at least that's what I tell myself. At work, completely different story. I've been at my job for the last 2 1/2 years. Let me just tell you, working here has made me want to jump off the roof. So much drama. Unnecessary drama at that. In the last few months, a lot has changed. Until recently...!!!

You know that moment when you suddenly feel like you're back in high school? Whether you do or don't. I'm certain all of us have experienced that one person who just makes shit hard for you. That one that gives you that snooty booty look like "I'm way better than you". Ugh... Can I please give you five fingers to the face? 

 I speak up and say something, now I'm the bad guy. I'm the one with an attitude.. I mean WTF! How is it this person is acting like the damn devil and it's alright? You can be reading this and thinking just say something to the person's face. Confront it! Well I did! And guess who got in trouble.... Me!

I feel like a movie played and I saw myself giving this particular person a good strong pimp hand to the throat! Whoa! Back to reality. Nope, there they are, still sitting next me and acting like they shit roses. 

To give you better understanding of where I'm going with this, I'm 100% talking about another FEMALE.... WWWWWHHHHYYYYY!!!!!!

Why do females act catty? We started out as pretty good friends. And then I found that not disclosing so much of my personal business with her, was actually doing my home life some justice. Now she is... well I would rather not disclose my obscenities. Criticizing my every move. Telling my boss every little thing I do. Shit, maybe I should make a video and give it to her. Better yet, take some pictures with my autograph! I FAMOUS!

You know what I'm talking about. When your tongue hurts because you continuously hold back. I'm screaming inside. I want so bad to just let loose and go all ghetto-fied. I'm pressing myself to be the bigger person. I'm breaking out the biggest bad of kindness any woman has ever seen. I don't know any other way to deal with this. The vicious side of me is enjoying her blood boil every time I'm being nice.

Call me immature.. I don't care. Every one of us have had to deal with someone like this. Telling you about it is actually making me feel better. The best part about this blog, I can feel her eyes on the back of my neck. She's struggling to read this. HaHa! For those of you who are or have been in my shoes... I want you to laugh out loud. To the woman who thinks she intimidates me.. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!  Take that... You're cut off bitch.. (in my Dave Chappelle voice)!!!! 

In the storm

I see her crying and I hear her heart breaking. I want so bad to pick her up, hug her and tell her," This storm will soon pass. Just continue to have faith."  I reach to help and suddenly realize I'm watching the woman in the mirror. Her face is recognizable. Her trembling voice is familiar. The woman I see is... Me.
She looks up at me. I see the pain behind her eyes. Her face is weary. She looks drained. Her body quivers as she cries. I'm hurting for her. Dear God, please save this woman. She needs your comfort. Please guide her to a place of warmth and love. Help her to see that she can be strong. I speak softly to her. "Please stop crying. I know you're hurting. I know you're tired. Please stop crying.
 I know it's hard and you feel like you're alone. I'm here. Please stop crying...." She wants to give up. She wants this pain to be taken away. I'm crying for her. She deserves something better.
 The broken woman slows her breathing as the tears begin to dry. "Take my hand, stand up" I say to her. Our eyes meet. Looking passed the hurt, the pain and her struggle.
We see a woman who discovers her strength. The courage to push one more day. The passion to embrace a new obstacle. We are reminded that life isn't easy. We have to fight for ourselves. Please don't cry... Please hold on. God is here. Let him be your strength. Let him fight this fight. Believe you can. Feel your courage.
Look into my eyes and see that you can overcome this. I am you and you are me.  
Please hold into me.....